so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
