I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
