Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
So much rum. So many feels.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
