I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Randomize
