I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
My feet surprised me
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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