Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
She bit a glass in half.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
