The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Randomize
