Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize
