i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Drunk is not a location!
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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