I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
