508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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