Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Randomize
