Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Soap is not a condiment
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
