Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
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