Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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