covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
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