Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
