Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
