My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I want to be your penis for a week.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
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