Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
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