quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
