Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
