i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
