I hate all girls vehemently.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
