Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
