Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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