All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
