So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
