I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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