I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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