I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
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