I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
