i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize
