Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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