i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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