Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
