Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
