so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
