And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize