I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
