every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
