fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I pour the whiskey from now on
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
