wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
