Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
