D3 body, D1 cock
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
