Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Randomize
