We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
