dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
