We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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