i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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